Providing feedback to employees is essential to the function of any organization, but many conflict-averse managers clam up when the time comes to critique a direct report. As a leader, you cannot expect to avoid the occasional conversation about poor performance or opportunities for growth. The good news is that these reviews don’t have to be awkward.

The Problem with Providing Feedback to Employees

Some leaders struggle with tough conversations. However, minor problems can snowball into big ones if they aren’t corrected. Withholding employee feedback is not an option for a functional workplace.

Author and former CEO coach Kim Scott discusses the common feedback pitfalls managers encounter in her book Radical Candor. Scott co-founded a company called Radical Candor, dedicated to helping managers improve their leadership by communicating honestly, effectively, and empathetically.

According to Scott, managers usually fall into one of the following categories when providing feedback to employees.

• If you care about the employee but are afraid to be direct with them, that’s called “ruinous empathy.” Your desire to avoid hurting their feelings prevents you from helping them reach their full potential.
• If you don’t care about your employee and aren’t interested in being direct with them, that’s called “manipulative insincerity.” You’re not invested in your employees’ growth, which prevents you from managing them effectively.
• If you don’t care personally about your employee but aren’t afraid to challenge them directly, that’s called “obnoxious aggression.” You’re the kind of person who sees no problem with being blunt and doesn’t care if it hurts your employee’s feelings.

What are the Principles of Radical Candor Feedback?

The fourth category, the sweet spot for employee feedback delivery, is called “radical candor.” This is the point at which you care personally about your employee and want to see them grow.

You also recognize that providing honest feedback is a kindness and an asset, not something to shy away from, but you do it with empathy and care. Because of this, you can challenge your employee directly. When combined with care and compassion, this is a surefire strategy for constructive critiques.

If you’re reading this blog, I can assume you care about your employees and want to become a better manager. The goal is to be direct and empathetic when providing feedback to employees.

Key Strategies for Balancing Empathy and Honesty in Employee Feedback

Being direct with your feedback is one of the best things you can do for your direct reports. However, criticizing an employee’s performance without recognizing their strengths is demoralizing. The solution is the sandwich method: positioning a critique between two layers of praise for a perfect balance of empathy and honesty.

What is the sandwich method of critiquing?

The “sandwich” in the sandwich method refers to the pattern of “sandwiching” constructive criticism between two compliments. First, you open with something the employee has done well. Next, you point out what can be improved. Finally, reiterate the positives and ensure employees know their work is valued.

With this technique, the employee hears vital feedback but still walks away with an overall positive impression that makes the criticism easier to swallow.

Be Direct but Compassionate

Some leaders are conflict-averse. They might feel that being direct comes across as blunt or rude. However, beating around the bush is the less kind option if your employee never understands exactly what needs improvement. There is a way to balance directness with compassion so your message is clear and kind.

Use Specific Examples to Guide Improvement

A successful sandwich method for feedback might look like this:

“Mike, you did a great job leading that meeting earlier. I know you’ve been working hard to prepare, and it showed. However, I did notice that we seemed to get off track towards the middle—it would have been helpful to distribute an agenda beforehand so we could stay focused. Can you make sure to do that next time? I appreciate your ownership of this task.”

Focus on Solutions, Not Just Problems

I have a twist on the sandwich method, I call “liked best/next time.” For example, “This is what I liked about what you did, but next time, think about trying it this way.” This way, the focus is on the solution instead of the problem.

Common Mistakes to Avoid in Employee Feedback Delivery

Ruinous Empathy vs. Radical Candor

Earlier, we talked about ruinous empathy and how it can impede an employee’s ability to grow effectively. Balancing sensitivity with honesty can feel like a fine line, and many managers err on the side of avoiding conflict. Don’t give in to the temptation to dance around the issues.

Being Too Harsh or Too Soft

It’s also difficult for some leaders to find the happy medium between being too harsh and too soft. This isn’t as hard to navigate as you might think. If you genuinely care about your employee as a person, you can find a way to be direct while also being polite.

Ignoring the Emotional Impact of Feedback

Any criticism, no matter how it’s delivered, has the potential to hurt an employee’s feelings, especially if other stressors are occurring in their life. Be mindful that even the most empathetic feedback might lead to an emotional reaction, and pay attention to your employees’ morale to make sure they’re taking it well.

How to Create a Feedback Culture Based on Empathy and Honesty

Encouraging Open Dialogue Across All Levels

Leaders can encourage a feedback-friendly culture by prioritizing radical candor at all levels of the organization. Offering training on this topic to all employees, as delivering effective feedback to team members is an art as well as a science. It’s not something that comes naturally to most, and it takes practice. The sooner you can get the ball rolling, the better.

Making Feedback an Ongoing Process

Providing feedback to employees should be such a regular part of your communication that it rarely becomes an extensive conversation. Moreover, that feedback should be delivered in a way that solves the problem while remaining balanced. By striving for radical candor, you can improve your relationship with your direct reports through mutual trust and understanding.

Leading by Example in Employee Feedback Delivery

Learning how to give feedback effectively is crucial for any business leader. You must practice what you preach and provide an example for your employees to follow. If this is something you struggle with, a business coach can help you develop your communication skills and give you the confidence to be honest with your direct reports.

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Coach Dave